And the greatest of these is Love ...

And the greatest of these is Love ...
1 Corinthians 13:13

Love Song - Third Day

Friday, September 10, 2010

The difference between friendship and love

The difference between friendship and love is how much you can hurt each other ~ Ashleigh Brilliant

by Jose Astorga and Carmel Brulez.

The difference between love and friendship is the level of commitment, sacrifice and preservation of personal space allowed. The difference between love and friendship is that love transcends all material space while friendship, even though capable of being transcendent has some minor limitations or differences.

There is no question that the lines between love and friendship can be blurred. Those are the friendships that rise into family love status and not simply because of a biological tie or lack thereof. And of course, friends can become lovers and eternal partners.

People are under the impression that they must love family simply because they are family. I could, but I would not necessarily categorize family care and bonding as love unless one has the opportunity to develop that special bonding that can be described as true love. Family begins with a blood line and genetic bond and love develops thereafter.

You see there are different kinds of love and friendships and they can be classified at different levels.

Most people experience a few loves throughout their life times and some only once.

True love never dissipates. It is alwayspresent.

One can move on and develop other relationships or even fall in love again, but true love is timeless and remains forever. Everything else is simply passing relationships. A love for one person simply gets set aside in order to function in a new set of circumstances or relationship where love can, like a flower, bloom again.

But true love never wilts.

For some people, the first inkling of true and the most innocent kind of love is the birth of their children. There is no more powerful love in the world than the love of a parent for a new born child and no more atomic powered love than that of a mother and child-it is almost beyond comprehension.

Then there is the love of a friend or family member where love develops into a strong and unquestioned support system that normally lasts a lifetime. Most people have many friends and acquaintances, but loving friendships can, for the most part, be counted on one hand.

How can you tell the difference? Simple. With true love, you never feel the need to lie and you can always be honest with yourself and the one you love. 

·        True love is present when honesty, compassion, forgiveness and understanding come before self-serving needs.

·        True love is present when life throws you a curve and as you fall out of the way or from the impact, someone is there to catch you.

·        True love is present when nothing is expected in return.

·        True love is present when you don't see someone for many years, yet not a moment has passed without her.

·        True love is present when the winds of change blow painfully hard and bonds remain.

The difference between love and friendship can be as fine as a double edged blade that can either cut you or groom you

Love is a strong pull towards someone irrespective of whether it is right or wrong or how the person behaves or treats you.

You may love someone who neglects you, hurts you, uses you, cheats on you or is violent towards you. You often wish you did not have these feelings for them as you would be better off without them.

Love within a one to one relationship is about a very special closeness, which usually includes passion, lust and romance. If both of the people involved feel that special feeling towards the other they are in love with each other. If they also feel they are compatible and have a lot in common and are on the same wavelength, with total honesty, they have the beginning of what could turn out to be a great relationship; so long as they both work hard at it.

Friendship is where you like someone but are not in love with them and do not fancy them.

A woman can have a male friend that she enjoys going out with and chatting to, but would never in a million years wish to kiss in a sexual way.

Friendship is more laid back than love. You might have a best friend who is important to you and contributes towards making your life happier, yet where you do not see them much. Perhaps you keep in touch with emails, phone or texts, but the fact that the closeness is there is the main thing. You do not need them to take up a large slice of your time to be happy. It is not love.

Love would mean that you would miss them and feel incomplete when you are apart from them. You would try harder to be with them and spend time with them and feel uncomfortable or sad when this cannot be.

Love is a very special feeling which you only have for one person.

You may have lots of friends and you may well value them all very much, but this person you love is the person you cherish above all of your friends. You value that relationship with the one you love the most and want to be with them the most. They are the one you wish to do special things with and plan a future with. You would make sure you spend a lot of time with them, if possible, live with them, be with them or see them a great deal. You would do anything within your power to make sure that nothing parts the two of you  whether this be another person, a job, moving or other circumstances you can make decisions about and control. This person is your other half. The person you think of when you wake up and think of when you go to sleep.

Sandy C Turk
Sent from my iPhone